Posted on by Santulan · 15 Comments

Dear Pins & Ashes

I met Pins And Ashes in the comments section of one of my blog friends. We got along after we started talking about Cadbury Silk on her then blog post, which only had her mention it once it.
Dear PnA,

First of all, I want a Silk now. It’s almost 12 in the night, and I am craving for something sweet. The fact that I am too lazy and go get some from the store is another thing 😛 . It has been so much fun in this ride together. The times spent on chat, Whatsapp, group chats and phone were fun. What was even more fun was to have finally met you in person. I should however be thankful that I made it out of meeting you without being punched 😛

The idea of a best friend has always been interesting. The idea that a person gets along so well with another is so comforting at times. I should have realized this when you spent comments describing in detail the Silk you were eating, while I was reading that particular post. When we’re not talking about food, we still have so many things to talk about. I think this is why when we did meet in person, it wasn’t like meeting someone for the first time, but like meeting an old friend instead.

I think what I cherish is the manner in which we click together. One such moment that I am going to remember is when I was travelling from Ahmedabad to Baroda and we were chatting in a group chat and you told me that you’d message me in Baroda. What followed was a discussion about a secret trip that you had planned to Baroda, and the places we would hang out at. All this just to have fun and make others jealous. It wasn’t something that we had planned on, but something that spontaneously came to us both.

For a long time, I had been wondering what I would write to you in this letter. It is now that I realize that I am at this loss of words because we’ve never shied from telling something to the other at face (or screen). Which is why I think that there isn’t something ‘new’ for me to write to you that I wouldn’t express to you in one of our chats.

Love,

Someone who shares your love for chocolates.

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Posted on by Santulan · 12 Comments

Will you marry me?

Dearest,

When one thinks of marriage and all the ceremonies that are associated with it, one can traditionally come up with images of gatherings of friends and family. The ceremonies beforehand, new clothes, festivities, the 7 rounds about the fire as the priest chants or the bride in a bright white gown with the groom in a black suit as the minister declares them man and wife and so on. The reception after that with the wedded couple on the stage as people take turns to wish them and pose for a photograph with the gifts they carry, and everyone smiling all around. It is indeed a wonderful sight to imagine with you in a sari and me in a sherwani.

 

Except, that it is not why and how I would want to marry you. I want you for how you are in your everyday. Yes, we will look better in our wedding dresses, having selected what to wear after careful choosing and scrutiny, with many man hours of effort in making us look better than we normally do. But, people don’t appreciate the effort in the everyday as much as I do. How you effortlessly carry off your daily sense of wearing. You don’t wear a sari in your everyday, but have you looked at yourself when you wear your daily clothes? Of course you have, but you haven’t looked at yourself from my eyes. There is a sense of awe I feel when I look at you in your everyday because in it your apparent effortlessness tries to hide the effort of the day to day. I find a trace of accomplishment in you that comes with being comfortable in one’s skin. When I say I want to marry you, it is this you that I want to marry. It is not the marriage of the sari clad and the sherwani clad that interests me, but that of you in your jeans and tee and me in my capris and shirt.

 

I understand wanting to celebrate it with our friends and family as one does at all occasions. I however, at times feel that marriage ceremonies are mostly like societal approval. I don’t want their consent to marry you, I want yours. I want to celebrate being together with you first, and friends and family later. I don’t think that my vows to you will be any more sacred with the holy fire as witness will be any more sacred than the ones I make to you when we’re alone in person. I never have believed, that having a fire or holy chants while we take our vows make our relation any stronger. It is the efforts that we put in the everyday that will make or break it, not the seven rounds we take around the holy fire as people shower us with flower petals and our parents get teary eyed. I definitely want to get a legal marriage certificate, as that would enable me to extend benefits like insurance and other things to you as it serves an advantage in my eyes.

So yes, if you want to celebrate with a large wedding then we will have that done. But marry me before you do in front of the rest of world. Let what it means to be ours, before it is so theirs.

 

My dearest, will you marry me?